There was another post in this thread that basically said, “toughen up buttercup” that I can no longer find. While I agree that this is a dickish thing to say, I can’t help but somewhat agree with the sentiment that tech workers are perhaps a little bit better off than the average person and don’t have a lot of perspective here about how bad it can get. Not saying that it’s ok, rather that when you can easily find another job it’s pretty easy to take a principled stand.
I flew for a living for a long time and was verbally harassed at many jobs by a superior. I remember talking on the radio once during a checkride - “do you have shit in your mouth? Because you sound like it.”
He was just being an asshole to rile me up, but it remains an asshole thing to say, and you have to deal with it because he literally holds your career in his hands. Personally, in that moment I vowed I’d never do that to anyone - but it doesn’t mean it isn’t widespread and it doesn’t mean quitting was an option.
Other times in my career I was expressedly told violate regulations or do legal but wildly unsafe things; because I had massive student loan debt at the time (I paid all that shit off eventually greatest feeling in the world), rent to pay, I had to make a lot of compromises I’m not proud of retrospectively because I did not want to be homeless or laid off looking for a flying job in 2009.
To act as though everyone can quit if their ego gets bruised by some jackass is the height of privilege. Many many other careers do not have that option. Not saying it is right in the least, but I feel a lot of people would really benefit from an understanding that how principled a person can be often practically changed by exterior circumstances.
That’s the thing I want people to take away from all this - a sort of “dialectical materialism” sort of view - that being able to quit without worse consequences than a bruised ego is unto itself a sort of prosperity many many people do not have.
I hear you, being able to leave a job and quickly find a new one is a great thing to have in this field, and it helps in having a great sense of job security.
The issue isn't that these jobs pay well and are great to work in so we should deal with any bs that flys. It's that people don't deserve to be harrassed, regardless of how "good" their work is.
If you make 2 million a year as an investment banker, you don't deserve to be unfairly humiliated at your job more than any part time fast food worker.
No but at least to me that is the implication. And I think it’s fantastic if you can, but a lot of times on here I see people who are completely out of touch with the material reality people live in.
Beyond that, there is a certain frailty to all this stuff too, nobody deserves to be treated poorly, but the inability to bounce back from that is not great either
Because other people have to basically behave like wage slaves, doesn't mean that is fine and programmers should just shut up and withstand abuse.
This is the same argument over and over that IT has it too good and maybe when there are layoffs or abuse scandals, some people rejoice in knowing they too are suffering like others. Like it's deserved.
It isn’t deserved, but also, you do have to be able to withstand some abuse in this life.
Not saying I agree with it, nor am I saying it should remain this way? But having the fortitude to tough out some shit is a valuable skill. Not saying that OP doesn’t, but also, a lot of people don’t.
> I remember talking on the radio once during a checkride - “do you have shit in your mouth? Because you sound like it.”
Reading this already sets me off. Why the FUCK do people have uninstigated belligerence at work and to the general at large? What is their problem?
Why can't a simple, "Can you speak louder? I can't hear you." suffice? I'm so sick of people not having basic decency. This kind of person needs to fuck off.
It wasn’t even that, lol, he just didn’t like how I sounded - it wasn’t even improper phraseology or anything he just didn’t like it.
Regardless, this sort of thing is not uncommon - it’s not right, but learning how to survive and withstand things that aren’t right so you can accomplish the things you want to accomplish is valuable. I actually - naively, thought academia would be different after a decade in aviation, hilariously academia was far more asshole-ish as a matter of percentage.
I had a very good advisor and instructors so I was spared most of the obnoxiousness, but I did see some sociopathic behavior. It’s life - between 10 and 20 percent of people are going to fucking suck.
"Toughen up buttercup" works fine when there is labor surplus. But during labor constraint the workers have all the cards. If it costs $30k to hire a new employee like it does in tech, you better treat them nicer than something like Burger King.
I flew for a living for a long time and was verbally harassed at many jobs by a superior. I remember talking on the radio once during a checkride - “do you have shit in your mouth? Because you sound like it.”
He was just being an asshole to rile me up, but it remains an asshole thing to say, and you have to deal with it because he literally holds your career in his hands. Personally, in that moment I vowed I’d never do that to anyone - but it doesn’t mean it isn’t widespread and it doesn’t mean quitting was an option.
Other times in my career I was expressedly told violate regulations or do legal but wildly unsafe things; because I had massive student loan debt at the time (I paid all that shit off eventually greatest feeling in the world), rent to pay, I had to make a lot of compromises I’m not proud of retrospectively because I did not want to be homeless or laid off looking for a flying job in 2009.
To act as though everyone can quit if their ego gets bruised by some jackass is the height of privilege. Many many other careers do not have that option. Not saying it is right in the least, but I feel a lot of people would really benefit from an understanding that how principled a person can be often practically changed by exterior circumstances.
That’s the thing I want people to take away from all this - a sort of “dialectical materialism” sort of view - that being able to quit without worse consequences than a bruised ego is unto itself a sort of prosperity many many people do not have.