This is the end result of the “but kubernetes is too complicated” argument. You end up hand rolling all of the things it gives you out of the box. I’m sure you have your reasons for not using kube, but every one of those things you mentioned you get in a standardized way with kube
We were on Mesos before so k8s complexity wasn't the deciding factor. If I cared about being could-agnostic, I would have gone the kubernetes route. The main factor was we decided to move as much as possible to aws managed services so that we wouldn't be responsible for their operation. Once we have made this decision, then paying the premium for EKS over ECS Fargate didn't make much sense.
From there a lot of our custom software is just adapting the AWS platform for our taste. For example, we define a lot of our routing configuration using docker labels (similar to Traefik), so we needed a reverse proxy that could handle that.
