>Lots of creeps here in the comments too. Some might call a 22 year old pretending to be helpful to younger 17 year olds for their ulterior motives, "grooming".
The age of consent is 16 in 16-33 states in the US (depending on how you count), and 17 in another 5. Wild to be labeling what is legal behavior in much of the country as "grooming."
I think often we way over-weight environmental factors in this area. As individuals we have crazy amounts of agency to change things for ourselves. FWIW I barely dated in school, partly because I didn't care much for social interaction but also (maybe mostly) because I was quite clueless about romantic attraction. Since graduating and especially getting into my 30s, things have become so much easier.
Especially as a male, you can really change your situation by consistently choosing to invest in becoming a compelling partner.
I mean, yeah? If it turned into harassment then no, but the post itself says that's not happening.
How is this any different from Bob talking your ear off about some hobby that he has that you have absolutely zero interest in? You just don't listen or tell him directly you don't care. This thread makes me feel like I'm going insane, this is basic human interaction.
Let's say there's 20 Bobs in your class, and they are pushy, not pushy because that would be harrasment ;) Also the Bobs don't give a shit about the class, they just got in to talk about [INSERT ANNOYING HOBBY].
It's totally okay if you say something that's totally not equivalent.
The specific numbers would make a big impact, and it depends alot on what we define as 'harassment'.
Is it 20 among a class of 600? Or is it 20 among a class of 50? How pushy are they about it? Do they stop if I tell them I don't care once? twice? twenty?
These are all relevant questions but it feels like many folks are automatically treating it as if they make up half the class and they're doing the absolute maximum amount that's just under what would be considered 'harassment'.
For what it's worth, most of the people in my college classes (including myself often) didn't give a shit about any part of the class except for the grade.
Worth considering that with the post in question, these male students are auditing the class so in general they have no consequences if they fail. They are there solely for the purpose of trying to sleep with younger female students and need to place no consideration on their academics.
And as for how pushy they are, according to the author, these male students are trying to take on a perception of authority (acting like instructors/TAs during classes) which implies some amount of attempted coercion (whether explicit or implicit) is likely taking place.
This type of power dynamic is really dangerous and it's a matter of time before somebody particularly scummy takes part and ends up victimizing one of the female students who are actually trying to pass the class.
> Let's say there's 20 Bobs in your class, and they are pushy, not pushy because that would be harrasment ;) Also the Bobs don't give a shit about the class, they just got in to talk about [INSERT ANNOYING HOBBY].
I don't mind - I can say "No" 20 times in a single day and then be left alone for the rest of the semester.
This is a fantastic suggestion. Probably not going to be applied by this professor but I love the symmetry of 'playing games' back and forth. Sounds fun honestly, as either side.
Definitely identify with this viewpoint -- I've heard the same feedback around the worldview being "unhealthy" but I would actually argue it is more accurate and provides clarity for me in regards to my relationship with my work. The main positive as I see it is in avoiding frustrations stemming from things completely out of my control.
I think that's a big part of the problem. I want to encourage more of that social life to happen in person. I would feel bad if I was causing them to miss out on IRL events.
The thing is, the half-life on this is ridiculously short. My approach now is to start flossing ~2 weeks before my biannual dental appointment. I always receive high praise about my gum health.
What a weird way to frame things. Grocery delivery is just a job specialization reality. There are many things I wouldn't do for others what they currently cost me, but that doesn't meant they're automatically unsustainable.
The age of consent is 16 in 16-33 states in the US (depending on how you count), and 17 in another 5. Wild to be labeling what is legal behavior in much of the country as "grooming."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ages_of_consent_in_the_United_...